Things Taken for Granted
by Double M B
Summary: So you know in the 2K3 version that one episode where Don goes into the future and sees Mikey and Mikey had no left arm? Well, this is how 2K12 Mikey would react to loosing his arm. This story is kinda depressing so if you don't like that kind of stuff, don't read. Rated T for violence and blood?
1. Chapter 1

**I promised myself I wasn't gonna cry! *Takes a deep breath* I do not own TMNT or any of the characters! I hope you like this fanfic, and here's a tissue, I'll probably need one too.**

***sniffle* Enjoy! *sniffle***

Mikey's POV

BLOOP BLOOP!

I ducked just in time. The pinkish beam fired and destroyed some crates behind me. I smiled, and stood back up, sticking out my tongue to mock them.

"The sticking out of the tongue from one of the ones called the turtles is considered offensive by Kraang." A kraang bot said, raising his gun up again. I smirked at them.

"You can't catch me! You can't catch me!" I mocked, starting to run away. Pink beams followed me, not even within three feet of my shell. I looked back to watch the beams go by. It reminded me of fireworks. Or, well, what I think fireworks look like from TV.

While I was in my daydream, or well, night dream because it's night, I crashed into some wooden crates. Lukily, I didn't get any splinters. Get it? Splinters? Like- Oh nevermind.

I rubbed my head and looked up. Three or four kraang were standing before me with their guns drawn. My smiled faded and fear filled my body. I started scooting back until I was in the very corner of the warehouse.

"Leo! Raph! Donnie!" I screamed. They all turned towards me and ran over. The kraang's gun started humming and beaping. My breath got fast and I saw my life flash before my mind. All my memories went through my head, like the good and bad ones. Fun and Boring, aka patrol. Normal and weird (I have a lot of weird ones). Pizza and not pizza.

I closed my tearing up eyes tight. My body started trembling and I expected the worse.

I saw white. I felt some kind of pain. Was this what death was like? Suddenly, I felt my arm get grabbed and I was yanked away. My chest rose and fell. Wait, I was still breathing. I felt the cold concrete ground. I felt pain. Slowly, I opened my eyes. I saw Leo standing over me and saying my name over and over.

"L-leo?" I asked, trying to sit up. I grunted and fell back. Something hurt but it felt like everything so I didn't know what. My eyes started drifting shut. I was so tired.

"Mikey, you gotta stay awake." Leo said, shaking me awake. He had no mask on for some reason. My eyes opened again.

"Tired Leo." I mumbled, "Some-in hurts. Bad." I grit my teeth and tried to sit up again. I raised my head a little to see Raph and Don bashing bots. Raph was especially destroying the one that tried to shoot me, or shot me, I really didn't know. I was looking to the left, and my gaze drifted down, to my laying left arm.

Only half of it was there. I had no arm from the elbow down. My breathing got quicker. The arm was loosely wrapped in Leo's blue mask. It was almost as red as Raph's with blood leaking onto the ground. My jaw dropped and I looked from it to Leo. From it to Leo, all the while letting out a tiny yelp. Leo grabbed my shoulders and shook me out of my freak out.

"M-my a-arm Leo. I-it's not t-there." I kept saying, stuttering in disbelief. Leo nodded solomly and held my other hand.

"It was shot off by the kraang Mikey. It would've got you're heart if i hadn't gotten you." Leo said. He's quite the inspirational speaker. I leaned up with much difficulty and hugged him with my right arm. Leo carefully helped me lay down onto his lap.

"I'm tired Leo." I kept saying, not really controlling it. I started getting really tired and dizzy. Everything turned a dark shade of red. I heard a muffled sound of Leo yelling something at me. It sounded like he was yelling at me through a really thick pillow. I saw the silloette of Donnie standing over me and saw him talking to Leo. Don started shaking me and yelling at me too. Don started touching my arm with his gentle hands. It throbbed like heck and I cringed, the red going away a little. Leo kept holding my hand and stared at me with fear. I didn't like seeing fear from my biggest brother. Or any of my big bros.

The red started coming back and it got darker until it turned black. I heard one last very muffled yell before there was silence. Everything turned black and my body went limp.

Normal POV

Leo's grip on Mikey's hand tightened and he shook Mikey violently. Don placed his hand on Leo's shoulder. He hated seeing him like this.

"Leo, calm down. Let's just get him back to the lair so I can patch him up right." Don said. Leo stood, biting his lip. They picked the limp body of Mikey and dragged him to the lair. Raph was far behind, he wasn't the best around bloody wounds.

"I'll need a blood donation from you when we get back. Mikey lost a lot of blood." Don said as they pulled Mikey down the manhole. Leo nodded. Raph closed the manhole and lead them carfully though the slippery sewers. They got back and brought Mikey into his own room. Leo layed him on the bad as Don went to get his medical supplies. Immediatly, blood covered the orange covers, but Leo didn't care at the moment.

"Okay Leo, get ready to give a lot of blood." Don said, putting a needle into Leo's upper arm. He took several needles worth of blood. Leo had to sit down afterwards, he got a little dizzy from the lack of blood. Donnie got real bandages and wrapped it around Mikey's arm. After Leo recovered from the blood donation, he took his bloody mask to wash it and in the meantime, he put on a back up mask he kept in his room.

"You're gonna be okay Mikey." Don kept saying, patting Mikey's head. He couldn't even imagine the freak out Mikey will have once he woke up. Mikey was left handed after all. After a little while, Leo came back in and sat beside Mikey. Don stood and lefft.

"Yell for me if anything changes or if he starts to wake up." Don said before leaving. Leo nodded and inspected his baby brother. Mikey's eyebrow ridges were raised and a cringe was on his face. Leo carefully untied Mikey's orange mask and sat it on the nightstand beside the bed.

"Come on Mikey, wake up." Leo whispered. After an hour or so of Leo pep talking Mikey to wake up, Mikey began to stir.

"Donnie!" Leo yelled, getting up and looking out the door. Don was sitting on the couch. He looked over and then ran down the hall into Mikey's room. Donnie entered the room to see Mikey's head turning side to side, his eyes not opening yet. He rushed to the seat beside Mikey's bed and checked Mikey's pulse. Mikey's baby blue eyes started to open ever so slowly.

"D-donnie?" Mikey asked, his eyes half open.

"I'm right here Mikey." Don said, taking his hand.

"M-my arm." Mikey said, looking over to his left arm. Or what was left of it. His eyes started tearing up and Don felt his pulse quicken.

"Calm down Mikey, take deep breaths." Don said. It didn't seem like Mikey heard him. Mikey tried sitting up, tears falling from his face and his lip trembling. Don grabbed him and tried to lay him back down, "You have to calm down bro." Mikey was choking on his own sobs, his right hand covering his face. Don bit his lip and tried to calm Mikey down. Leo turned away, not liking to see any of his brothers upset. Raph didn't even dare enter the room or he too would be freaking out.

"M-my arm." Mikey kept saying between his sobs. Donnie quickly wiped his eyes before he could shed any tears. Leo couldn't hold it any longer. He stepped out of the room and quietly cried, burying his face in his hands. Leo could Mikey's cries and sobs and it made Leo feel worse.

"Mikey, you really need to calm down." Don ordered, staring Mikey in the eye. Mikey looked up with glassy eyes and slowly nodded. He laid back down and tried taking deep breaths. Don kept his hand on Mikey's wrist and waited for the pulse to go back to normal.

"C-can I go to sleep now?" Mikey asked, looking up at Don and wiping his eyes. Don nodded.

"Just call for me or Leo is you need anything." Don said. He stood and quietly closed the door. Right after he was out of the room, Mikey started crying again, but not as bad as he was before. He just laid there and stared at the ceiling, crying himself to sleep.

**It's just so sad! I'm sorry I started a new story before finishing one but I couldn't help it! The idea is fresh in my head so yeah. New chapter should be up soon and maybe on Turtles to Humans to What too. I hope you liked it and please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

Mikey's POV

My eyes fluttered open.

Maybe last night was just a dream. I thought, not wanting to look over and see if it was. Of course with my Mikey curiosity, I had to. It wasn't a dream. I sighed and tried to sit up. I always used my left arm to push me up, but as I bagan to, it started hurting really bad. Taking a breath, I fell back onto my bed. I really didn't want to call for Donnie because 1. He might still be sleeping and I didn't want to bother him, and 2. I really didn't want special treatment.

I tried again, instead using my right arm to boost me up. It felt awkward, but I was able to do it. I smiled in victory and pushed myself to my feet. Suddenly, I heard something from the hallway and before I could react, my bedroom door opened.

"Mikey!" Don yelled, rushing in. I rolled my eyes and sat down on the edge of my bed, "You're supposed to call for me!" Don said.

"You didn't tell me that." I said, crossing my arms. I mean, my arm.

"Well you should've known. Do you know what could've happened?!" Don asked. I mentally rolled my eyes again, _Yes, but you're going to tell me anyway._ I thought as Donnie went through the long list of what could've happened. I zoned him out and stared off in space, "Are you even listening?" He asked, my gaze went to him.

"No," I mumbled, watching him go into another one of his medical blah blah blah speeches.

"I'm hungry." I said, interupting him (I knew he hated when I did that I mentally smirked). He frowned at me, "May I leave my room Docter?" I asked with a tiny hint of a smile. Don looked like he was about to explode and yell at me more and I knew he wouldn't because he was giving me the special treatment I didn't want.

"Yes, but you can't cook." He said, knowing he got to me. I could almost see the smirk hidden in his face.

"It doesn't take two hands to flip pancakes." I defended, crossing my arm again.

"No." Don said, standing and offering my a hand. I pushed it away and stood on my own.

"You're not the boss of me." I said. Don turned and placed a hand on the doorknob.

"Leo and Splinter already said no." He said before leaving. I took a deep breath so I wouldn't hit him upside the head with my arm nub. I opened my bedroom door and walked down the hallway.

"Morning Mikey." Leo said, once I entered the kitchen. He was standing over the stove with some kind of food that MIGHT be edible. I crinkled my nose in smelling something that smelt like burnt rubber. I didn't even dare ask what was for breakfast. Don sat down across the table from me.

"Does your arm hurt?" He asked, going all docter on me again. I sighed.

"What do you think?" I asked, a little harsh. Don nodded.

"How bad? Scale of 1 to 10."

"Eleven." I said with a shrug. Don slapped his forehead, knowing he wasn't going to be getting anywhere with me.

"Can you be serious for just one minute?" He asked. I smirked, knowing something that he would normally slap me for.

"I am Mister Docter Donatello Sir." I said, leaning up against the table. Don raised his hand but took a deep breath and put it down. He mumbled something under his breath that I couldn't make out. He had a very colorful language when he got mad (Even worse then Raph's at times).

"Here's your breakfast." Leo said, sitting a plate that looked like road kill in front of me.

"Uh, thanks?" I said, poking it with my fork. I stuck my tongue out and when no one was looking, I dumped it in the trash. I stood up and grabbed a cereal box and milk to make myselff cereal.

"Why are you getting cereal when I just gave you-" Leo said, looking over at the empty plate at my seat.

"I'm, uh, still hungry." I lied, spilling some milk on the counter. It was a full gallon and hard to control with only one hand to steady it. Leo looked over at me and kindly (not really) offered to pour it for me. I sighed and handed it over, knowing he was going to either do it for me or help me. It felt like I was a little kid and couldn't do anything on my own. I went over to the paper towel roll and started unrolling it for a only one little towel. I jerked my hand to the side to rip it off, but instead, it unrolled even more. Don got up and rolled it back up, ripping off a towel and cleaning up the spilt milk for me. I sat down and held my head in my hand.

"Here." Leo said, sitting the bowl in front of me. I huffed and stuffed my spoon into the cereal. _I'm suprised they're not feeding me_. I thought, staring down at the bowl. Raph finally staggered in and sat down beside me.

"How you feeling?" He asked, patting me on the shell. I know they were only trying to be extra nice to me and help, but right now I wanted to crush their skulls.

"Peachy." I said, my mouth full. Raph nodded and got up to get himself some breakfast. I finished my food and picked it up, standing and dumping it in the sink.

"I need to do a little check-up on you Mikey." Don said, standing in the kitchen doorway. I groaned and just followed him to his lab. I sat down on a little wooden stool next to his chair and rested my head in my right hand. He took my half arm and inspected it. He did several tests that seemed pointless and forever.

"We'll be able to take the bandages off in around a week or so." He finally said. I nodded, "I need to probaly sew it up so it can heal better." I nodded again, "I already had a quick sew so it wouldn't get infected. I did that when we got back and you were passed out." I just kept nodded, not really paying attention, "You're not listening to me again."

"It doesn't take a genius to figure that out." I mumbled. He frowned at me.

"You sound like Raph. Loose the attitude." Don said, "As I was saying, I need to redo the sew." I straightened, my eyes widening, "Now you're listening."

"No Donnie no!" I said, standing and stepping away. Don just stayed in his seat.

"It won't take long Mikey. I'll give you a sedative so you won't feel a thing." He said.

"Yeah, and that comes from a needle." I took another step back.

"Would you rather have your arm get infected and have no left arm at all?" Don asked. I hated when he did this.

"No," I said, walking over and plopping down.

"Good, now let's get to it." He said, leading me to my room. I bit my lip and laid down. Don tapped the needle. He did it like he was mocking me. I turned my head away and waited for the stinging of the needle. It felt like it lasted forever. Finally, the stinging stopped and Don sat beside me, waiting for it to kick in.

My vision started getting blurry and I started getting tired. After last night with the getting tired thing, I was scared to fall asleep. Sleep, though, is a very powerful force and it overcame me. Everything turned black.

_I was still in black. Was this death or a dream? I didn't know because I don't know anybody to come back and tell me what death looked like. I started seeing fog rolling in and assumed it was death._

_I looked down at myself, I still only had one arm. Maybe this wasn't death. Or maybe it was. Who knows? I shuddered, wishing death came with a coat._

_"Hello?" I called, looking around. I started walking forward, "Hello!"_

_"Mikey?" A voice came. Nobody was around me and the voice was famliar yet I couldn't figure out who it belonged to._

_"Yeah? Who is it?" I asked, turning around in circles. I saw a silloetted figure in the distance._

_"I'm you." It said, stepping forward. I stepped back. This was the weirdest dream ever. Or weirdest death ever. I probaly will never know._

_"How can you be me if I'm me?" I asked, taking another step back. Mikey smiled at me. I didn't like that smile, it gave me the creeps._

_"I'm your conciousness." He said. He took a step forward._

_"Am I dead?" I asked._

_"I only know as much as you do." He said, motioning towards me withh his own arm nub. I looked down at him then to myself. He was starting to sound like Splinter with his smart talking. I inspected him better. He was exactly like me but with darker skin and mask. My gaze drifted to his eyes. My own eyes widened. His eyes were black and where the color part is (Don exlained to me what it was called, but once again, I paid no attention) it was red. He stepped forward again. I took a step back, he is not going to get close to me._

_"Don't worry." He said in a tone that I really didn't like or trust. Me or not, he wasn't going to come within three feet of me. Let's just assume that this is death and he is the devil._

_"Why are you here?" I asked with a shakey voice. I wish that I could just wake up, or that Mikey devil would disappear._

_"This is your mind. I'm your darkest form." He replied with an evil smile. His teeth were sharp as knives._

_"Can I see my brightest form?" I asked, stepping back again._

_"He's not here. He does not exist. I am how you really feel. Therefore, the only one in your presence" He said, taking two steps forward. I wish he would stop talking in riddles._

_"But I don't feel bad." I said. He smiled and stared down at my left arm. It started filling with unbearable pain and I fell to my knees, screaming._

_"Yes you do." He said, coming forward. I tried to get away but I was glued to the ground with pain. He put a hand on my left shoulder. It was ice cold and made my arm feel worse._

_"Stop!" I yelled, tears falling from my eyes like a waterfall. I closed my eyes, not wanting to look at him. He was evil. He couldn't possibly be me. Could he?_

_"I can't stop. You're controlling this dream. This is how you feel right now." He grabbed my shoulder and tightened his grip. I lost feeling in my left shoulder and arm. I wanted to make it stop, but the pain wouldn't let me._

_"I am pain. You can't overcome me. I am every pain you feel. Mentally AND physicly." He said, twisting his hand. It felt like my left arm was just going to fall off._

_"Stop!" I screamed, collasping to the ground. I opened one eye to see him over me, evilly smiling. His red eyes seemed to glow. If he was me, why isn't he wriching in pain?_

_"I bring pain. I don't feel it." He answered for me. I hated this guy. Did that mean that I hated myself? Great, now I was talking in riddles._

_"You know that it's all your fault that you're feeling this." He said, kicking me in the plastron. The wind was knocked out of me and I was coughing for air, "If you were paying more attention, you wouldn't have tripped. If you had crawled away, and not in the corner, the kraang wouldn't had a chance to shoot you. If you had called for your useless brothers earlier, the beam would've missed you." He said, letting go and walking around me. I tried to get up but it hurt to bad, "Admit it, you wish that the beam could've just shot you in the heart. You wish that you could've just died instead of having one arm. Don't even lie. It's the truth and you know it." I stared away, not wanting to meet his red eyes. I started crying again, curling myself into a little ball._

_"You cry to much you baby." He said, kicking me, harder this time. I just wanted this to end. I hated this guy, even if it meant I hated myself. At this point I kind of did hate myself. He had a point, it was all my fault. I just wanted the pain to end, this dream to end, my LIFE to end. I just couldn't take it anymore. He appeared in front of me with a toothy smile. I watched him turn and walk away, laughing the whole time. I turned the other direction and cried. Even though he was gone, the pain remained. It hurt more then ever. I got tired all of a sudden._

_The fog went away. I wasn't cold anymore. I felt no pain. The black lit up to white. I was alone in a giant white room._

**I hope you liked this chapter. Please review and tell me if you liked it!**


	3. Chapter 3

Donnie POV 

I know I could've just numbed up the area to stitch Mikey up, but I really didn't want to bring Leo and Raph in here to hold Mikey down. Even though Mikey would've been numb and wouldn't feel a thing, he still would've been freaking out with just the sight of the needle (I tried doing that when he had a bad fall in the sewers a few years ago. Trust me, it wasn't pretty and it took way longer then it should've. The power of suggestion overpowered him and he actually thought that it hurt. He kept squirming and I actually had to strap him to his bed while Master Splinter tried to calm him down and of Leo and Raph literally sitting on his legs to keep him still. He's a lot stronger then he looks).

I sat next to Mikey and waited for him to wake up. I checked the time on my laptop. He should've waken up a half an hour ago. I pressed my fingers to his wrist, checking his pulse. It got quick. I looked up at his face. It was pressed into a grimace and a few small tears rolled down his freckled face. His chest rose and fell as if he was out of breath. My own pulse quickened; not knowing what was happening to my only little brother. I kept my fingers to his wrist, praying that his pulse would slow down. Sweat started rolling down his face and his mask started getting damp.

"What are you dreaming about Mikey?" I quietly asked as I gently untied his mask and sat it on his nightstand. I was about to let go of his wrist to get a cold washcloth, but his pulse changed. It started getting slower and I let out a sigh of relief. I was to soon to celebrate. His pulse got slower and slower. His chest still rose and fell, but it was a bigger gap between his breaths. With fear, I watched his chest stop moving. Under my fingertips, his pulse just stopped. Sweat started running down my own face.

I should've just numbed him up! I scolded myself. I jumped up and ran to my lab for an oxygen tank and anything else that could bring him back. Leo was sitting in front of the TV and Raph sat on the couch. I didn't want to catch their attention because I didn't want some freaking out big brothers in the same room as a freaking out me. I quietly made my way back into Mikey's room and put the oxygen mask onto his face. I had adjusted the mask to fit our turtle beaks (I had gotten it a few years ago when I went on a secret trip to the surface. I was only 12 and a very curious turtle at that). I pressed my ear hole to his chest and prayed to hear air circulating. I was at least hoping for a tiny heartbeat, but heard nothing. I jumped back up and ran to my lab, not as quiet as last time.

"Mikey awake yet?" Leo asked, muting the TV and turning around. I didn't have time to answer. Time was something that Mikey didn't have either. Leo, apparently, say the scared look on my face and abruptly shot up. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Raph shoot up and the both of then dash to Mikey's room. This is something I REALLY didn't want right now. I picked up the defibrillator that I'd made a while back. Quickly, I ran back to Mikey's room and kicked open the door. I saw Leo on his knees holding Mikey's right hand and Raph sitting in the chair in the corner. Leo was biting his lip to keep from crying. I could tell that he was loosing.

I sat the defibrillator down on the nightstand and rubbed the two pieces together.

"Clear!" I said in more of a yell. Leo let go and backed away as I touched the pieces to Mikey's chest. His body rose and fell back onto the bed. I pressed my ear holes to his chest. I heard the faintest beat of his heart.

"Clear!" I said again, doing the process over. The heart beat got stronger, but still inconsistent. I tried it one more time, not even caring to say clear again. Leo started crying quietly. I bit my lip to keep myself together. One single tear rolling down my face, I bent down and pressed the side of my head to his plastron. There was a beat every half a second. It was slow but a beat nonetheless. I sunk to my knees and caught my breath. I turned the defibrillator off and leaned my head against the edge of the bed. I pulled his right hand over and felt the pulse. His chest started moving again and I smiled. I kept the oxygen mask to his face so he could breath easily.

I could see Leo pulling himself together and Raph just sitting there with his arms crossed. He showed no emotion but I could see through him. Fifteen years of living with him and his strong emotions, I knew that he was probably sobbing earlier. He was really quick when it came to pulling it together. He hated whenever we saw him cry. It made him feel weak (I know because I overheard him talking to Splinter once about it. And no, I was not eavesdropping). None of us like each other to see us cry; we all feel that if we cry, it'll make us look down on each other. Mikey and I hated to see Leo cry especially because he's always been our leader, our role model, our big brother. He was the one we went to when we had a bad dream or even if we just needed to talk. That is a big brother's role after all.

"Is he going to be okay Donnie?" Leo asked, fake coughing to hide the shaking in his voice. I waited a little and kept track of Mikey's pulse.

"Yes." I said. I hated answering yes or no questions because it felt like since I was the smart one, it all depended on me if someone would be okay and if I said yes and they weren't going to be okay, it'd be my fault. I felt a little guilty giving Mikey a sedative. He wouldn't have come close to death if he hadn't been knocked out. I kept telling myself that it was okay that I did, but it didn't help my case at all. I sighed and sat up, pulling a stool over for me to sit on. Mikey began to stir and His eyes started twitching.

Even though it seemed like he was slowly awakening, he shot up with a start. I jumped as his hand yanked away. His breathing got fast again and he started sweating. I was about to say something when he buried his face in his hand and sobbed loudly, tearing the oxygen mask off his face. I softly put a hand on his shoulder.

"Mikey?" I asked quietly. He shook my hand off and turned away. I took a deep breath and turned to Leo. Leo nodded, knowing I was asking for help, and walked over. I stood so Leo could sit down. He leaned forward towards Mikey.

"What's wrong Mikey?" He asked softly like he would when we came in during the middle of the night after a nightmare. Mikey turned around and wrapped his arm around Leo. Mikey really shouldn't have been freaking out like this because of his stitches but he really had to get this off his chest.

"M-me." Mikey cried. His eyes were closed tight and tears just kept falling with no sign of stopping. Leo looked back at me with a confused look and I returned it with a shrug.

"It's okay Mikey." Leo said, rubbing Mikey's shell. Mikey turned his head and buried it in Leo's neck so I couldn't see it. He slowly stopped crying, taking inconsistent breaths every so often. Leo just kept his head on Mikey's and kept rubbing Mikey's shell.

"It's okay." Leo said again. I think it was more for himself then Mikey.

** I hope you liked this chapter, I'm sorry for the little thing about the stitches, I know I should've done my research (I just wanted an excuse to have a chapter like this. Lazy writing, I know) Anyway, please review and I really appreciate you following me and favoriting the story!**


	4. Chapter 4

Mikey's POV

I really wantd to exlain my dream to my brothers but I didn't want them to feel sorry for me even more then they do now. I just mearly said that it was a nightmare and I didn't want to talk about it. Leo said to call for him if I wanted to talk about it and the three of them left.

I laid back in my bed and just stared at my left arm. Don had put banages around it so it could heal better. I sighed, wanting to go to sleep but scared to. The last thing I wanted was another weird nightmare.

"Mikey?" Leo asked, peeking his head inside the door. I turned my head and raised my eyebrow ridges.

"Yeah?" I asked, putting my hand behind my head.

"You okay?" He asked, coming in and sitting beside me.

"If by having your arm get blown off by the kraang you mean okay, then yeah, I'm okay." I answered, sitting up. I pulled my legs over the edge and sat beside my eldest brother.

"I don't like it when you're like this. When you're sad, we're all sad." He said, putting an arm around me. I leaned against him.

"Well, I can't really be happy yet and I'm not the mad type." I said, taking a deep breath. I stared down at my arm nub for a little bit, "I wish I wasn't so stupid."

"Mikey, I hope you didn't just say what I thought you said." Leo said, leaning back and looking at me. I shrugged.

"It's true though. I was already a liability before and now I'm more of one. Now I'm just a bigger burden on you guys." I said, looking at the ground. Leo grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me until I looked up at him.

"Michelangelo, you are NOT a burden on us. Nor are you a liability. You have always been an important part of the team and an even more important part of this family. Don't you EVER forget that." He said, giving me one of his looks. My eyes teared up and I tried to push away the tears. I wanted to believe what he said, but right now, I just really couldn't. Instead of objecting, I just nodded. Leo sat back down and gave me a hug. I just rested my head agaist his shoulder.

"I'm sorry." I said. I felt really guilty. Even more then usual. Leo softly patted my head.

"It's okay." He said, resting his head on top of mine. It felt like I should say sorry more but I kept my mouth shut. I pulled away and laid back down.

"Hey Leo?" I asked, laying on my side.

"Yeah Mike?" He asked, standing up and sitting on a stool.

"How would you react to loosing you arm that you write with?" I asked, looking up at him. He looked taken back by the question.

"Well, uh," He began, looking for an answer.

"Exactly." I said, turning over. Leo was about to something but instead, just stood and left.

"Just, call if you need anything." He said before closing the door. I sighed and rested my head back. My gaze drifted to my arm nub and my eyes started tearing up. Again.

"Come on Mikey, stop crying." I told myself, sitting back up and wiping my eyes. They filled with tears again. I just kept may face facing the ground and let the tears roll down and fall to the floor.

Why did this have to happen to me? I wondered, looking up at the ceiling. My sadness was replaced by anger and I grit my teeth, staring at my half arm. Tears of anger flowed down my face and I shot up, swinging my arm nub at the wall. It hit with a thud and my arm filled with pain. I ignored the pain and kept hitting the wall.

"WHY?!" I screamed, choking on my tears. I could see a blood stain seeping through the bandages. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, still hitting the wall.

"Mikey!" I heard Don yell. My lip trembled and I ignored him, "Michelangelo! STOP!" Don yelled, grabbing me by the shoulders and yanking me back. I fell down onto my bed and kept crying.

"WHY?!" I screamed again, trying to get up. Don pushed me back down onto the bed. I finally gave up and collasped onto my knees on the floor in front of him. I burried my face in my hand and sobbed. Don started rubbing my back. He was going to be mad at me, I knew it. I had just damaged my arm more. Him mad at me was the last thing I wanted.

"Mikey?" He asked softly after my sobs subsided. I didn't look up at him, I just kept staring at the ground. I really didn't want to look up. I don't like my brothers seeing me cry. It makes me feel like they look down at me even more then they do now. I sniffled and wiped my nose with the back of my hand. Finally, I looked up.

"Sorry Don." I said quietly.

"Is your arm okay?" He asked. I could tell that he wanted to give me a whole speech.

"It hurts. Bad." I said, holding it up for him to inspect. He took a deep breath and unwrapped it. I turned my head away when I felt his hands run over the stitches.

"Lukily, you didn't break the stitches." He said, pulling out some new bandages from his first-aid kit he brought. He gently wrapped it again.

"Sorry." I said again.

"It's okay Mikey." He said, letting go of my arm. I slowly lowered it to my side and slid up onto my bed, still staring at the ground, "All that matters is that you're okay." He said, sitting down beside me and giving me a hug. I nodded and kept looking away. All this guilt was buidling inside of me. I was making my brothers upset by just being here and being upset. Tears welled up in my eyes and my bottom lip quivered. I started taking deep breaths and kept looking at the ground. I didn't want Donnie to see me cry. Again.

"I'm sorry," I said, choking on my words and starting to cry. I burried my face in his plastron and sobbed quietly. He just reated his hand on the back of my head.

"It's okay Mikey. It's okay." He kept saying. I nodded, tears still rolling down my face.

** This is probably going to lead into Same as it Never Was. Please review and I hope you liked this chapter (sorry for not updating sooner, I was working on my other fanfic).**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for the late chapter, well, really late, but here it is! I hope you like it! (and thanks for sticking with me)**

**Enjoy! :)**

I walked into the kitchen the next morning, I was a little startled when I ddin't see my left arm, but I guess I'll eventually get used to that. Nobody else was up. I slowly rose and stepped over the empty pizza boxes to get to the entrance. From there, I tip-toed to the kitchen.

"Maybe I can fix something small." I whispered aloud, getting a pan out from the cabinets, "Eggs? No. Bacon? Naw. Pancakes? Let's do it." I said, looking through the fridge and pantry. I picked the pancake mix, grabbed a few eggs, and started the stove. As I waited for the stove to heat, I picked up an egg and was about to break it when-

"Mikey!" Don yelled, making me jump. He stormed over to the stove and turned it off, picking up the eggs and putting them back in the fridge. I sighed and rolled my eyes, mouthing what he was about to say, " Mikey, you shouldn't be cooking without another one of us in here! You-"

"'Could've gotten really hurt.' I know Don." I said with a groan. Don shot me a glance.

"Mikey," He said rubbing his temples.

"I know." I replied.

"Mikey." He said more sternly.

"I know!" I said a little to loud. Don's eyes grew wide and I looked away, resting my head in my hand again. I could see Don staring at me out of the corner of my eye. I sighed, "Can you just fix breakfast?" I asked, not looking at him. I heard the stove start and assumed that he was fixing breakfast.

"What do you want?" Don asked, pulling the eggs back out of the fridge.

"Just some pancakes," I said, "with chocolate chips." Donnie nodded and cracked some eggs into a bowl. I just wanted to scream. I couldn't handle it; I mean cooking (and of course pranking) relax me and stress was building up from just watching. It's kind off like backseat driving. And no, I'm not a control freak. *couch* Like Leo *cough*

"Mikey, if you need to talk, just talk." Don said, looking over his shoulder at me. I shrugged, "It's going to be easier talking to me then Leo or Raph." After he said that, I sniffled, tears wanting to fall.

"I-I just-" I started, my voice shaking. I stared at the dirty floor, a tear falling. I bit my lip then started crying. Don turned off the stove and walked over to me, placing a hand on my shaking left shoulder. This made me cry more. I had my hand up to my face, tears making it wet and slippery.

"It's okay Mikey. It's okay." Don said, patting my shell. I could tell he was trying his best not to cry.

"I-I just want my arm Donnie." I said between sobs, "I just want my damn arm." Don looked shocked at what I just said.

"Don't cuss." He said, "Or at least not in front of Raph, Leo, of Splinter. They still think you're a little angel." I smiled a little, sniffling and wiping my snot on the back of my hand, "One cussing turtle is enough." I stopped crying a bit and started laughing softly.

"Sorry." I said after I stopped laughing. Don patted my arm nub.

"It's okay," He said standing back up, "Will it make you feel better if you can have whipped cream on your pancakes?"

"And chocolate syrup?" I asked with a weak smile. Donnie smiled back.

"Of course." He said, flipping the pancake.

"You weren't messing with toxic chemicals before you started cooking were you?" I asked, the thought hitting my like a frying pan. Don gave a worried face and rushed over to the sink.

"And that's why I don't cook." He said, putting the toxic pancakes onto a plate to throw away, "Should I save these for Raph or would that be mean?" He asked, nodding to the plate in his hands. I laughed a little and put my hand on my chin.

"That definatly is a hard one," I said with a fake sigh, "Well, I guess it'll have to be a no. He _is _our older brother after all." Don smiled and dumped them in the trash. I rested my head back in my hands and waited patiently for the next batch.

"Mornin'." A voice said from behind. Don and I looked over to see Raph standing in the doorway, tying his mask on. Don and I exchanged a look with big smiles, "What?" Raph asked, walking over and sitting across from me.

"Nothing of yur concern." Don said, turning back to the stove. I smiled and started whistling (or as much as I could 'cause I can't whistle). Raph rose an eyebrow ridge and looked at the two of us before shurgging.

"Wha's for breakfast?" He asked, crossing his arms and sitting back in his chair.

"Chocolate chip pancakes." Donnie answered, sliding a few on a plate and sitting it in front of me, along with a can of whipped cream and chocolate syrup.

"Save some for me, Mikey." Raph told me, nodding to the whipped cream. I nodded, spraying probably half the can into a big cone shape and drenching it with chocolate syrup, "You're gonna be hyper all day you know." He said. I smiled over at him with my mouth full of food. He rolled his eyes with a grin.

"Where's Leo?" Don asked, giving Raph his pancakes. Raph shrugged and put what was left of the whipped cream onto his meal (which wasn't much).

"I'll check his room." I said, shoving the last of my food into my mouth and standing. I rushed out and walked into the hallway, going to the last room on the right. I knocked silently, pressing my earhole to the closed door. I slowly opened the door and peeked in.

"Leo?" I asked softly, squinting in the darkness. My eyes grew wide and I rushed back into the kitchen.

"Leo's gone!"


End file.
